keeping busy

sooo...I'm working now...just part time...as an admin + tutor at a tuition centre...nothing big...but at least I'm doing something productive instead of "slaving" in front of the PC the whole day...hahaha... />.< ...with the works, applications and my other obligations such as updating my many blogs ( ;p ), I'm pretty much keeping busy...and I like it...dumdidumdidum...

well, this is a Draculaura doll...just got it yesterday

a character in Monster High...one of the mains

I've always wanted dolls like this...but they are not that cheap... :I

well, they still scare me coz I'll always thought they'll come alive

but that's what fascinates me

tihihi

:3

so, till next time, bloggy

sorry I rarely update you

Tumblr is a lot easier

haha

( ,^^)/

not working

~sigh~
all this distracting
they are not working
did they ever was.?. 0_o
ha...ha...
to you, please don't give up
there are people who care about you
-tight hugs-
I know this isn't much
but believe me
good things will happened
and I'm sorry
I'm so so sorry
I can't be there
you'll always be in my prayers
-hugging you tighter-

working with aunty

well, as of today, it has been a month since I worked with my aunty...I started on the 1st of July...so, yeah...it was fun...though I am not sad that it'll end in a week's time...the last day of Ramadhan will be the last day of work...wootwoot...gonna find other works to let me pass the time after this...dumdidumdidum~~~

again and again and again

I keep seeing those words
again and again and again
I know it's never gonna happen
but why do I still feel like this
self, I thought you are better now
you are not at all, huh self
you still couldn't get out of that, huh
~sigh~
self, just let it be
just stop hoping for things
just coz that thing with Twitter,
you are happy all over again
urghhh...grow up...
it's just a short thing
and you know it...you know it all along
and yet, you still feel like this
again and again and again
sucks to be you...

need to be check in the head

~sigh~...I don't know...these past few days, I've become damn confuse of what's happening and what happened...I'm confuse about reality, dreams, fantasies...maybe I fantasise too much...or maybe my dreams were a bit too realistic...but seriously, though...I would wake up from a sleep, whether in the morning or afternoon or evening, and I would think to myself "wow, what a good day" and then I realized I was just dreaming...damn it...and sometimes, when I'm reminiscing about a memory, it took me a while to realise, it's not even a real memory...it was just one of my damn fantasies...I hope this doesn't go on...coz there might be something wrong with my head...really need to check it...or maybe, I should just stop making up scenarios in my head and watching or reading real messed up stories or movies or series...should get a reality check and keep track on what's real, what's not...come on...it isn't that hard, right...I can effing do it.!. \(~_~)/

some part of me

I'm not a very good human being

I did things that are sometimes just plain bad

but I always try being a good friend...

(yes, there's a difference between being a human and a friend...-wink-)

though I do sometimes slip up

in actuality, I always try to avoid conflict with others, especially my friends

it wasn't for my sake, it's for theirs

coz the mellow-happy-go-lucky me can be downright mean and cruel when I'm pissed off

the words spewing out of my mouth sometimes hurt others so much, they cried

and that's why I always wanna look at feel the bright side of things

always make a fool of myself, being crazy and all

all so that my mouth does not utter hurtful words too often in a mean way

can't register

well, the main reason that I can't register is coz of the fees that I haven't paid yet...heee...totally forgot about it...but then again, even if I did I still can't register...well, I don't think if it's my fault or not...but the story goes like this...to register, we have to have at least 12 credit hours...as for me, I only have 11...and some of the courses, I have to pass this sem's first before I'm able to register...~sigh~...so, that would make it less than 11...ho-hum...whatever it is...I have to wait till the results come out to be able to register the courses...~big sigh~

so many things to say

yeah, I do have lots of things to post about
but for now, I don't really have time to really talk about them
so, I'm just gonna talk about the little trivial things that had been happening
well, for one, though I've finished lots of my work
there are still enough to swamp me
and, there are some things that I need money for...
well, I'm not really having money problem
just thinking of the things I'm about to spend them on
is justified or not...like do I really 'need' to...or do I just 'want' to...
hurmmm
then, there are these social obligations
enough said...-wink-
ho-hum
aaand...sometimes I think I fantasize too much
I should just put up another blog
to fill in with all the stories my mind came up with
the mysteries, the crimes, the sex, the murders, the ghosts
gathered from the numerous things I watch and read
last but not least, my sports time
I don't really get to do much nowadays
especially since the rain keeps appearing in the evening
and I have early morning class
weekends are good as I sometimes go back and get to swim
but all in all,
my life is pretty good and I'm thankful for it
as in comparison to the population of some part of the world,
I am, living a good life
: ) 

where oh where oh where

walking and keep walking

turning and keep turning

where oh where oh where

~sigh~

pebbles turned

rocks tumbled

grounds cracked

where oh where oh where

~sigh~

lethargy sets in

lay down for a bit

close those lovely eyes

and breathe the last sigh

ahhh

after an eternity without

well, I'm just exaggerating

it was more like 2 weeks

urmmm...nah...not really

just about 8 days, I think

after about 8 days without the internet,

I'm finally able to reconnect with my beloved

oh, fast awesome internet connection

I dread the day we will part again

-isk-isk-

T_T

well, then

lets enjoy out limited time together to the fullest

\(^o^)/

2nd year

well, today marks the 2nd year of this blog

even though I didn't post something

everyday

but at least I've managed to post something

every month

keep up the good work ya,

Abyssus.!.

\(^o^)/

superficial

well, Ramadhan is coming...
and as usual, I'm not that excited about it
for me, it's just another obligation, just another something that we had to do
and the same with Syawal...it's to celebrate how we managed to go through the fasting month successfully
(I've made kinda the same entry a year ago; old or cynical )
but really, nowadays, people just celebrate it for all the superficial reasons
they buy expensive stuff, do things to impress others...you know
birthdays, events, celebrations...
ahhh...the superficial aspects of human nature...
well, I'm not excluded...sometimes, I was like that too... >.<
you know how human is...
getting all excited doing things that they think the other party will like
or impressed by
oh, well...
without the superficial aspects, we are not human
just as long as you not letting it consume you too much
by buying too much new clothes, too much new furniture
just to celebrate that one event
it's stupid...and I'm ashamed to say, I'm stupid like that too, sometimes
now, I'm just trying to buy things for the long haul
not for that one thing, but just so I can use them over and over again, through the course of time
muahahaha!!!
oh, well...lets be a bit superficial
just not too much...and make it seldom
(^o^)v

weird silly interesting dream

I had the weirdest, silliest but quite interesting dream I've ever remember...

in the dream, my family secretly 'engaged' me with some guy...I think it was a family friend's son...

and I was protesting it a lot...

even stayed in the uni during the holiday just so I won't be at home...hohoho...

but the ring, I could't pull it off...and it was a really nice diamond ring...if I say so, myself

;p

and all my friends were gushing over it while I hate it... (>_<)

then, when I went home for awhile, my family tricked me into going to a store or a mall

but instead, they brought me to the wedding...

and I was so pissed off, I cried and then, I started being very, very violent

muahaha...

and that was when I woke up... 0_0

and I was like, "What the hell..."

then, I know I had to go to the bathroom...hahahaha...

well, I guess, it was because I was watching an episode in 'Charmed' where Prue was forced to marry a demon of some sort

coz I've always like putting on a movie or something like that before I slept coz I know they can be incorporated into my dream

well, choose other type, next time

\(^o^)/

the room

well, my sis just got back from London yesterday...
so, I asked her what she wants to do with our room...like does she want a specific colour or what else...
but she said she didn't mind what I did to the room
so, I was thinking of painting it a lilac colour...well, I prefer darker but since the room doesn't get any sun light, it'll be a cave... >_<
and I was thinking of buying black bed covers...or maybe dark purple...since mommy might have an opinion about that...hohoho
as for the closets, mommy already have a few ideas...I just want lots of racks to put my ornaments and decorations and stuff...hehe...
now, I'm not sure whether I really want to paint the room or not...if I'm gonna, I'll have to do it before I go back to school next Wednesday, or Thursday
and better install the closets quick before I start my short sem...if mommy wants to
hurmmm
well, lets just see about it
/(~~, )\

fairy tales

I'm writing this coz of an event that happened yesterday

the event was an inter-college English drama competition

the theme was "Mixed Fairy Tales" where they were supposed to combine at least two tales into one story

and I got a bit annoyed and irritated as they got the term mixed up

especially to the organizing committee

just because a story was made into a cartoon and produced by Disney or DreamWorks or others

that DIDN'T make it into a freaking 'fairy tale'

Tarzan, Mulan, The Lion King and The Prince of Egypt weren't fairy tales

they were just tales...of moral and such...

especially Mulan and The Prince of Egypt

one was based on legends, the other on Exodus

which was clearly not a fairy tale

and they had the gall to call those 4 'famous fairy tales'

and I was like; "what...the...hell.?."

and furthermore, when there were mentions about the god and goddesses of ancient time

they were MYTHOLOGY...not fairy tales...

Norse, Greek, Egyptian

Thor, Zeus, Ra

well, since it was 'mixed' maybe they 'could'... @_@

~sigh~

I know, I know...stupid of me to rant on something like this

but it's just sooo infuriating.!.

if you want to organize something, make sure you do it right

sure...we make mistakes...

but when you have lots of people working together,

how come not a single person notices...

ho-hum

and by the way...I still couldn't believe the plays that confused me and several others won something...

'''-___-

angst

hurmmm...
it was a very 'interesting' night
so many calling and texting
and crying (-eyes rolling-)
with so many emotions
first I was happy
then sad
and then happy again
and then annoyed
and then pissed off
and then 'in-the-zone'
and then happy again
and a lil bit irritated
and back to sad
and now, I'm just trying to be calm
~sigh~

p/s:...good luck and congrats...

remember and forget

it's hard to decide what to remember and what to forget

sometimes, we just can't have one without the other

if we want to remember the sweet times,

we can't do it without remembering the depression we want to forget

if we want to forget the feelings,

we can't do it without forgetting the connections we want to remember

oh my, oh my...

sometimes, the best choice is to just suppressed them

you are not forgetting, but you are not remembering either

but too much can be poisons to your mind

gonna spin out of control sooner or later

it's good if you've practiced it since you were little

oh, well...

things happen for some reasons

we just gotta accept it all

the good, the bad, the beautiful and the ugly

mirror, mirror on the wall

as a person, or more commonly, as a girl
I sure like to look at reflective things
mirrors, glasses, spoons (haha), screens
anything that can reflect enough
but to have a mirror in my room all the time, where I'll glance at it once a while, is a NO-NO
I have one...of course...how else I'm gonna do my make-up... ;p
but I'll always cover it up or turn it facing the wall or put it in my closet after I've finish using it
I don't know when it started
but maybe coz I've watched or read too much...if you know what I mean...tihihi
I know I'm being silly-ly superstitious...but I just can't help it
>_<

p/s:...and oh, welcome March...hope you'll be another good one... X)

clean up

have to clean up the whole house today
coz i'm going back to U tomorrow
~(*o*)~
have to

-organize the the books...including those in Adam's room

-wash the dishes and organize them on the dish rack nicely

-clean up the living room real nice

-clean up the kitchen real nice

-clean up the bathroom real nice

-wash the stove and the fridge

-organize my room...stuff to bring, and stuff to stay

-last but not leas, sweep and mop all over...

well, guess that's all
get to work, you lazy ass
~(-o-)~

p/s:...i'm writing this post just to procrastinate...hahaha... >_<

losing weight

during this exam period
it's easy to loose weight
and it's not because you want to
it's just coz you are too lazy
to go down to the cafe
or make your own food
like me, for example
if it wasn't for going to classes
i'll probably eat less
ho-hum...

p/s:...i'm gonna gorge myself on lots after this is over...ooohhh, yeah!!! X)